Saturday, August 8, 2009


Recently, many Mets banded together to announce their solidarity in growing beards and keeping them until the team would reach the .500 mark.
But after Thursday night's loss in San Diego, right fielder Jeff Francouer, perhaps sensing that if he kept up the strange male beard bonding until season's end he might end up looking like the fourth member of the '80s cult rockers, ZZ Top (left), saw the light and broke out the razor.
"I might have had it until October," Francouer frankly told the New York Daily News.
Maybe now -- the day after yet another dismaying defeat, courtesy of a walkoff grand slam in San Diego off suddenly beatable closer, Francisco Rodriguez -- and sporting an embarrassing 51-58 record, other Mets will come to their collective senses and break out the shaving cream and electric and straight razors.
Otherwise, with the rate the Mets are plummeting in both the National League Eastern division and wild card standings, by September, they'd likely resemble the barnstorming Christian Israelite House of David teams of the 1920s and 1930s.
Could those teams be any worse than the current Mets?

The ridiculous exercise in communal hair growing underscores the futility of this lost Mets season. It's about as juvenile as that "Beavis and Butt-head" episode of yore, when the two laughable cartoon teenage buffoons cut hair from their heads, then clumsily glued the clumps to their faces in a pathetic attempt to "score" with chicks.
One can only hope Francouer's teammates will follow his example.
The notion that more follicles can get the Mets to the .500 mark -- or any kind of respectability -- this season is pure folly.

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